Bleach Porn Story: Sink Into Me

Chapter 3

There were very few things that could leave Shaolin Fong (now more commonly known as Captain Soi Fon) silent in shock. A naked post-transformation Yoruichi had certainly lost that power quite some time ago, the stupidity of her underlings was something she had adjusted to over time and the one thing that had worked recently – the sight of Captains Zaraki and Unohana in an extremely compromising position in one of the exam rooms – had plastered itself over her retinas for a week afterward, rendering her thoroughly desensitised. However, what greeted her at the office when she arrived the next day was entirely unexpected.

“What the hell are you doing here?” While the shock remained, the silence was never going to last long.

Grimmjow looked up from the papers he had been filling out and raised an eyebrow. “I’m fucken tap dancing. Would’ve thought the jazz hands would give it away. Shit, I’m doing the paperwork. Ain’t that what I should be doing?” He grinned wickedly, looking her up and down. “Course, if you got somethin’ or someone better for me to do, bee, I’d be happy to oblige.”

Fighting the urge to strangle her lieutenant (she had plenty of practice with this particular urge), Soi Fon clarified. “But it’s the beginning of the work day. As in, before noon.”

He shrugged. “Thought that was when I was supposed to be here.”

“Since when is that something you concern yourself with?” She spat the words out, her voice venomous, and was surprised to see something unfamiliar flicker across his face, something that almost looked like guilt, before his features schooled themselves into an arrogant smirk once more.

“If you feel like letting me sleep in, bee, just say the word.”

“That was not what I meant. Still, it’s good of you to finally show up on time. I won’t be holding my breath to see if it’s habit forming but, since you’re here, you can take the troops out on patrol.” She stalked over to her desk to look over the week’s roster.

The smirk widened as he got up to leave, walking up behind her as she read. “Well bee, if it means spending time with you I may just take it upon myself to come in early more often.” His eyes full of mischief, he tugged on one of her braids.

Her own eyes widened as she whirled around to face him, only to find that he was already halfway out the door. “This isn’t early! This is when you’re supposed to come in. Hell, it’s when you’ve been supposed to come in for six months now, you bastard!”

Storming toward the doorway, she stepped out and continued to yell at his retreating back as it disappeared down the hall. “And if you ever touch my hair again, I will end you! You hear me? Not even your little human friend will be able to put you back together!”

Taking a deep breath, she glared at him as he turned the corner and vanished from sight, amusement clearly written on his face. She couldn’t help but feel she had missed something…

“AND DON’T CALL ME BEE!”

Slamming the door as she re-entered her office may have been childish, but it was soothing, especially when she imagined that his head was attached to the doorframe.

xXx

What followed was possibly one of the most confusing days Soi Fon had experienced in a long while. Sure, Grimmjow was being his normal, annoying self, but in between hitting on her and riling her up, he was actually being – dare she say it? – Helpful.

Which was just plain wrong, as far as she was concerned. Well, yes, she would concede that she’d actually gotten everything that needed to be done today finished in time, so that for once she wouldn’t be here until dark, but it had meant that he was under her feet the whole time, being his usual crass self. Interestingly, despite having to put up with him for an entire day, rather than the usual few minutes it took before he drove her to exile him from the office, Soi Fon realised that she hadn’t found him quite as annoying as he normally was.

Of course, it helps that I could send him off to work with the officers whenever he was starting to be… more aggravating than usual.

Shaking her head, she looked over to his desk, and the pile of completed paperwork that sat there. Her lieutenant wasn’t there – he was working with the new recruits again.

This is unnatural. Jeagerjacques doesn’t work unless there’s something in it for him, so clearly he’s after something here. But what? A raise? That only comes with a rise in position, and they won’t be making him a captain anytime soon, no matter how helpful he suddenly becomes.

No, he would have to know that. He’s an ass, but he’s not stupid. So, what is he after?

The object of her reflections stuck his head through the doorway, interrupting her thoughts.

“Oi, am I done here?”

Charming, as always. “Yes, lieutenant, you can go after you tell me how they went this session.”

He shrugged as he sauntered in. “Same old. They can’t fight for shit. Are you sure we can’t just chuck ’em in the Eleventh and let the survivors be seated?”

The same thought had crossed her own mind once or twice, which was a little alarming. “Tempting, but no. You will continue to train them, with an emphasis on their hand-to-hand work and on improving their stealth capabilities.”

“The fresh meat? Shit, why me?”

“Because having a single trainer will provide them with a thread of continuity and it will give you a chance to better assess their progress over time.”

He looked at her accusingly. “You jus’ don’t wanna do it yourself.”

That may have been slightly true, but she wasn’t going to let that bother her. “Are you going to argue with me over an order, Jeagerjacques?”

“Che, whatever. And it’s Grimmjow.” He ran a hand through his untidy hair, the bright blue strands returning to the same disordered state despite his efforts. “Guess I’ll see you after the weekend, unless ya planning on headin’ out tonight?”

It took her a few seconds to realise that he had asked her a question. “Oh. I hadn’t considered it.”

He shrugged. “After the weekend it is.” Grimmjow’s smile turned into something of a smirk. “Unless you get lonely. I’m only a hell butterfly away, you know.”

“Not in this lifetime, and you aren’t supposed to use those for personal purposes.” She scowled, before pointing to the door. “You’ve been dismissed. Go infuriate someone else.”

“But you’re the most fun, bee.” In a burst of sonido, he was out the door before she could respond, leaving her to glare after him.

The hell with it. I might as well go out tonight. Considering how today’s gone, I could use a drink.

xXx

As far as a night out in the Seireitei went, you couldn’t go past the latest fixture on the bar and club scene, a rather interesting living-world themed offering owned by the Shihoun clan (when they felt like admitting it). It was popular with shinigami of all ranks and had been christened ‘Death and the Strawberry’ by a slightly intoxicated noble, much to the chagrin of a certain substitute shinigami who happened to be close friends with the aforementioned noble’s adopted sibling (another thing that was popular with shinigami of all ranks was playing ‘Six Degrees of Ichigo Kurosaki’, but that was an entirely different matter).

Yoruichi stood on the second level, looking down over the many people scattered over the dance floor and milling around the bar, only to be distracted when a familiar voice sounded just behind her.

“And to think the rest of your family are ashamed they own this place. Honestly, it’s almost as though they don’t want to connect with the people.”

His ubiquitous fan in hand, Kisuke Urahara joined Yoruichi at the railing, a wry grin on his face. Yoruichi chuckled, shaking her head.

“Please, the rest of the Shihouns would never refer to this lot as people. I think my Aunt Reiko actually calls them ‘the unwashed, uneducated plebeian masses’ instead. She’s fun like that.”

“Still, the point remains. What objection could your dear Aunt Reiko – “

“She’s not my dear anything. She was the one who sent her personal assassins after you when you were exiled because she decided that Central 46’s ruling was too lenient, remember?”

“If I made an attempt to remember everyone who’s tried to kill me, either in person or through the use of minions, I think my poor little brain would simply explode. It’s all too much for a simple creature like myself.” Fanning himself, the man who was almost undoubtedly in possession of the finest mind in the Seireitei grinned at his companion, who snorted in response.

“You fool no one. Anyway, what about Reiko?”

“Oh, I was just wondering why she has an objection with the Shihouns finally mixing with the, uh, unwashed, uneducated plebeian masses? It is making them money, after all, and saving them from social and financial ruin. They don’t even have to have anything to do with it, short of reaping the benefits.”

Yoruichi rolled her eyes. “Ah, but it isn’t fitting for a princess of the Shihoun clan to own such a tawdry establishment.”

There was a bitterness to her tone that made him turn to scrutinise her, before shrugging and slinging an arm around her shoulders. “A direct quote, I take it?”

She sighed. “You bet.”

“Now do you remember why following a mad scientist exile into the living world was preferable to staying a princess?”

She laughed, breaking away from his embrace to smack him lightly over the head. “Baka.”

Kisuke grinned back. “Got a smile though, didn’t it? Anyway, I know what else will. There’s a little bee who just walked in and is clearly looking for someone to drink with.”

She looked back over the railings. “So there is. You want to join us?”

He shuddered. “I’m fine. I am sure Soi Fon is lovely once you get know her, but she still has that look in her eye when she talks to me that suggests that, if she has her way, I am not long for this world. Come to think of it, I think your Aunt Reiko does the same thing – “

“Ha ha. They are nothing alike. Reiko is just an evil, selfish, stuck up bitch – “

“Don’t hold back, tell me how you really feel.”

“Ass. Anyway, Shaolin isn’t like that.” Yoruichi sighed. “Really, she’s just lonely. I really screwed her up, leaving the way I did. I mean, I don’t regret my decision to leave – “

“I’d have to hope not, otherwise we’re going to have a serious talk after you chat with your little bee.”

“Why do I put up with you? No – don’t answer that. Look, I don’t regret leaving, or keeping her out of it. I just wish I could have explained things. I don’t know, left a letter or something. At least given her a reason not to spend the next hundred years building up an ice bitch exterior.”

Kisuke smiled. “You’re worried about her.”

Yoruichi grimaced. “Well, yeah. She’s like the little sister I never had. Everyone else seems to be shacking up together and settling down, and she’s just there on her own. I don’t want her to end up – “

“A crazy cat lady? A bit hard, given that she hangs out with you.”

She laughed at that one as she shifted back into his arms. “Touché.”

He shrugged. “You walked right into that one. And I wouldn’t worry. She may be a little bee to you, but she’s more than capable of taking care of herself. There’s someone for everyone, she’ll get there eventually. Now, go keep her company.”

Pulling her closer, he kissed her, feeling her lips curl into a smile as his own moved against them. She pulled back, letting him see her grin.

“Thanks Kisuke. I’ll see you in a bit.” She trotted off, slinking between members of the crowd on her way to the bar, where a short woman with wrapped braids was sipping a gin and tonic. He watched her go, the smile on his face hidden by his fan, until a head of electric blue hair that appeared to be travelling toward the same destination caught his eye. His grin widened.

This could get very interesting…

xXx

Sitting at the bar, Soi Fon glared into her drink, cursing annoying shits of lieutenants who suddenly underwent suspicious personality transplants. It was shit like that that she just didn’t feel like dealing with, damn it. The war was over, her squad had managed to come out of it reasonably undamaged and had recovered, no thanks to her lieutenant. If Jeagerjacques wanted to try and mess around with a division, he could find another one – she was not interested in letting an arrogant prick screw things up now that she’d actually gotten them working smoothly at last. She sighed, mentally cursing the Captain-Commander for placing him with her. Creatures like Jeagerjacques had no place in the Second Division, no matter what personality changes they decided to manifest.

Even if they did actually get their paperwork done and the recruits trained with the bare minimum of whining.

Of course, then there was the other problem. Since her last talk with Lady Yoruichi, she had suddenly found herself noticing Grimmjow as something other than her aggravating lieutenant. As much as she hated to admit it, her mentor did have a point when she described Grimmjow as good looking. For all that he was his usual asshole self around her, she couldn’t help but notice the way his eyes lit up when he was teasing her, or that the smirk that crossed his face on such occasions was enough to stop her in her tracks.

Almost. At least, she’d recovered before he noticed. Kami, she hoped she’d recovered before he noticed.

Damn you, Lady Yoruichi.

She swore to herself as she threw back the rest of her drink, signalling the bartender for another.

“Bad day, bee?” Yoruichi had slipped over silently and was now perched on the barstool next to hers.

Soi Fon nodded to her companion. “Lady Yoruichi.” She turned back to stare at her drink. “You could say that.”

The noble raised an eyebrow. “Or…”

“You could say that it’s been a mind fuck from start to finish. That would be more accurate.”

“Uh huh.” Yoruichi looked a little more closely at the woman beside her as the bar tender brought out the drink she had asked for. “How many of those have you had?”

Throwing her newly received drink down her throat before the other woman could object, she muttered, “Four. I need them, trust me.”

Yoruichi shrugged. “Far be it from me to argue. Lemme guess – Jeagerjacques strikes again?”

“Yes and no.”

The former exile rolled her eyes. “Helpful. I’m gonna need a little more to go on here, bee.”

“Fine. He’s started doing his job properly.”

“And that’s bad?” Yoruichi would have assumed such an occasion would involve a celebratory drink, not a session designed to drown sorrows and annoyances.

“It’s just plain wrong. Why the hell would he change? He’s been able to get away with all the shit he’s been pulling for six months now, he knows I can’t do anything. He’s not going to get a promotion, there’s nowhere for him to go, so there’s no incentive there. I don’t get what he’s trying to pull!”

“Ok, I get it. You’re alarmed because you don’t know what his motives are, anyone would be.” She considered the situation. “So what, he’s undergone an entire personality change?”

Soi Fon snorted. “I wish. No, he’s still hitting on me any chance he gets. In fact, that’s the only thing that hasn’t changed. It’s disturbingly reassuring.” She shuddered. “Kami, I never thought I’d have a reason to be glad of his advances.”

Yoruichi grinned. “Glad? That’s a bit strong. Sounds like someone’s warming up to him!”

Her response was a glare. “You are not funny.”

“And you’re blushing.”

Horrified, Soi Fon’s hands went to her cheeks – and found that they were cool.

“Got ya!” Yoruichi looked like, well, the cat that got the cream. “Though you actually thought that you would blush. Interesting. You know, little bee, that almost implies that you think there’s a reason to blush.”

This was not Soi Fon’s night, that was for sure. “Can we get back to our original topic?”

“Nah, I like this one. It’s fun.” She leaned toward Soi Fon, who had now buried her head in her hands, and poked her shoulder. “You liiiike him, don’t you?”

Fighting the urge to scream, she lifted her head to glare at her mentor. “I do not.” Sighing, she continued, knowing that Lady Yoruichi wouldn’t let it go otherwise, “I will admit, he is fairly attractive. For a complete and utter bastard.”

“Who’s being a bastard? Want me to go beat him up for ya, bee?” An all too familiar voice joined the conversation. Soi Fon took a deep breath, and accepted that her night was cursed.

Of course he’d show up now. There is no god.

Yoruichi had an expression on her face that indicated that she was about to burst out laughing. “Hey Grimmjow, take a seat. There’s one on the other side of Soi Fon.”

He shrugged and sidled over, giving Soi Fon a brief opportunity to turn to Yoruichi and mime slitting a throat. Yoruichi, of course, chose not to notice and Grimmjow, entirely oblivious, continued, his trademark smirk on his face. “I’m just here to order, won’t stay long. Seriously though, who’s been messin’ with you, little bee? I can fuck him up for ya! Not that you need help doling out violence but, everyone should know that pissing you off is my job an’ I don’t want competition.”

Soi Fon contemplated the wisdom of ordering another drink. Or leaving for the bathroom and just never coming back. Or killing both her antagonists and/or herself.

“It is none of your business, Grimmjow. Anyway, don’t you have friends? Other people to annoy? Some idiot to sleep with?”

“Now, bee, I’m hurt. ‘Sides, haven’t you noticed? I’m on the straight and narrow from here on in. All that shit’s in the past.”

She looked sceptical. “I’m sure. Excuse me if I harbour some doubts. Your record is somewhat against you.”

“Ah but bee, you’ve inspired me.”

“If you were really inspired, you’d address me properly”, she muttered, trying to ignore the woman beside her as she quaked with suppressed laughter.

“Sorry, Captain Bee.” He nodded to the bartender as she brought over his beer, grabbed it and rose from his seat. “I’ll be off, but I’ll see you bright and early on Monday. ‘Night, Lady Yoruichi.” He nodded to her, his face carefully neutral, before turning his gaze to Soi Fon, the corner of his lips twitching into a smile. “‘Night, Captain Bee.”

He disappeared into the crowd, leaving Soi Fon to groan and place her head in her hands once more, growling out, “It’s not funny, Lady Yoruichi.”

The woman beside her gave in to her laughter. “You’re right, it’s not funny. It’s hilarious. You two are better than cable.”

“What?”

“Living world thing. One of the few parts of exile I miss.” Her laughter subsiding, she turned back to Soi Fon, who looked deep in thought.

Between Lady Yoruichi and that bastard, it’s a miracle I haven’t snapped. Damn you Jeagerjacques. Damn you and your smirk.

It’s supposed to be infuriating, not sexy.

Damn it.

Her thoughts were interrupted by a poke to the shoulder and she looked up to see Yoruichi staring at her, a wicked grin on her face.

“What?” Soi Fon snarled tersely.

There was a pause, before –

“You liiiike him.”

“You know, sometimes I really hate you.”

It was definitely not Soi Fon’s night.